song.

Hard as these past few days have been, its a damn good thing. I guess I'd forgotten who I was.
I'm the happy one.
I'm the carefree one.
I'm the one who loves to sing.
I'm the one who does what she pleases because it makes her happy and doesn't give a damn whether or not you like it. 
I'm the beautiful one.
I'm the happy one because I deserve it.
Nevermind my father called me a slut.
Nevermind my two year relationship wouldn't work because I wouldn't put out enough.
Nevermind my grades are lower than shit.
Fuck you.
I'm doing just fine.
I feel high. I feel light. I feel swell.
This past year already seems like a blur of gray. Plagued with some unsatisfied idea of rejection, hate, revenge, dullness. I almost forgot about every ambition I've ever had. I almost forgot about every passion I've held. All for what? Absolutely fucking nothing. I'm a hot mess of passion and feeling and I love it. I'm addicted to it. Ups and downs. I'm ready.
I want to live my life for me.
I want to walk the streets of New York City and spend every dime to my name.
I want a random hook up in Paris.
I want to get lost in a vineyard in Italy. 
I want to experience hunger and thirst in a third world country.
I want to sit alone in a bar and listen to anyone who wants to tell me a story.
I want to meet my hero.
I want to create something that will outlive me.
I can be inlove with me, and that can be enough.
I have no direction. I want the north as well as the east like west as bad as the south.
The best part of an end is the beginning.